I could see the concern look on my volunteer’s face as he showed me the text message. The text was a cry for help from a frustrated parent. She reached out to her son’s small group leader because her son was acting out and ignoring her. I asked my leader, “Why do you think this is happening?” He said, “I did learn that his parents are going through a divorce, and I’m sure this is him rebelling.” We arranged a conversation with the son and are currently walking with him and his parents during this difficult season.
It’s during situations like this when I’m grateful for leaders who know their parents. It lets me know that the youth ministry is still working, even when I’m not in the office. When it comes to partnering with parents and accompanying families, it’s important to extend your resources in sustainable and creative ways. The best place to start is:
GETTING YOUR VOLUNTEERS ON BOARD WITH THE STRATEGY
Your volunteers need to know that they are liaisons between families and the ministry. In addition to learning the teens’ names, they need to know something about their parents and family dynamics. Please do not assume that your volunteers know that they should interact with parents. Clarify and repeat your expectations so that connecting with parents and the rest of the family is a part of your culture.
When we get volunteers on board, you have someone caring for your teens on a deeper level. It allows you to focus on big picture items. You can rest your ministry is working even if you are not available.
MAKING YOUR MATERIALS ENTIRELY TRANSPARENT
While there are great resources for parents and families, sometimes the best ones are used with teens. Next time you are giving a talk, record it and send it out to parents. Ensure they have access to the reflections, questions, and any other content you use with your teens. Don’t be afraid to let them know what you are doing regarding ice breakers and games. Share it so that parents are aware and informed of what you are doing in your ministry.
When parents have access to your content, not only will they have more success engaging with their teens, but they’ll be more invested in your ministry and their own discipleship. Remember, we don’t always retain what we learned as teens, and your materials could be a refresher for a parent who isn’t confident or is new to their own faith.
INVITING PARENTS TO ENGAGE WITH THE PARISH AND NOT JUST YOUR MINISTRY
When a youth ministry functions as a silo, it isolates the teens from the rest of the parish and their parents. While youth ministries should have resources and programs for parents, they should put their primary focus on connecting parents into the rest of parish life.
If your parish has small groups, outreach, and ministry opportunities, it’s essential to encourage parents to get involved. It will help them grow in their personal faith, helping them to become confident in their witness. Parents who are serving in the parish are not only a good example of a disciple for their teens, but are going to be better at getting their own teens active in the church. Make sure parents are taking advantage of everything your parish has to offer.
Partnering with parents goes beyond the youth and children’s ministry because it involves everyone on staff. Parents do have a lot on their plates, but we also know that parish involvement can make their families stronger. We need to accompany them just as much as we accompany the teens. As you create efforts to reach the next generation, do not forget to include their parents.
How would you describe effective partnering with parents?