Who doesn’t like tacos? I knew even if the night didn’t go well, people would walk away thinking, “At least they had tacos.” I was nervous, it was launch night for our young adult small groups and I wanted to make sure that people had a good time. As people arrived, my nerves subsided, they liked the tacos, they were connecting with one another and as the night closed I could breathe. The young adult ministry we’d been trying to build was finally in motion.
Young adult ministry has been a much talked about subject, even before V National Encuentro and the Synod on Young People in 2018. As a youth minister it was always on my to-do list to create a substantial young adult ministry, but with the demands of middle, high school and Confirmation ministry I couldn’t get it going. But, we’ve been able to make adjustments, through delegation of other tasks and being more comfortable in my current setting we’ve started to put a plan together and this is what we’re learning:
It’s easy to make assumptions on what younger generations need. We think back to when we were in our 20’s and think that what was relevant then is still today. It just doesn’t work that way anymore because the world we live in is so different. The best solution is to listen to:
Ask them about their lives, listen to their story and use that to determine the content and strategy for using them. You can do this in listening sessions or through one on one relationships. Challenge the staff and leadership in your parish to connect with at least 2 young adults for no other reason than listening and learning. If you don’t know young adults ask your youth minister or reach out to an empty nester. The time you take to listen will be beneficial beyond belief.
When I was in college I used to hate sitting at the kids table for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Being one of the oldest in my family the conversations at the kids table were a little immature. I wanted to debate, listen and learn from my aunts and uncles at the adult’s table. For many of our young adults they have that same feeling they get sitting in the pews each week. They see opportunities to serve and engage but they feel like they aren’t welcome.
Your parish council and committees should be flooded with young adults. Your ministry opportunities should be lead by young adults. As emerging leaders they can bring new ideas, fresh perspectives and help you reach an audience you’ve been missing. All it starts is by inviting them to join you at the table.
Most young adults are transient; therefore, they are seeking meaningful relationships. For most of their lives from the first day of school to their last days in college they’ve been in organized community. In the real world it’s the wild and that can be intimidating.While technology has connected them to thousands of people they are still thirsting for real community.
Churches need to be intentional when it comes to connecting with young adults. They might show up to a parish wide event, but if they don’t see anyone their own age or if they aren’t in tune to the content then they’ll disengage. Creating young adult specific small groups, outreach opportunities and social events is important because it gives them a first step to parish life. It lets them know that they aren’t alone and that there are other people out there searching for similar things.
Have we perfected this at my parish? Not yet, we’re just starting, but we’re passionate about figuring this out. I do know what will make it more effective is if more parishes get serious about investing in young adults. If we’re in this together, we’ll be able to show high school students that there is something for them after they graduate and before they have kids. We’ll be able to walk with people during some of the most chaotic times of their lives. We’ll be able to show a whole generation that God loves them.
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