How To Prevent Teens From Leaving Church After They Leave Home

It’s heartbreaking when you learn a former teen is no longer going to church. You feel like a failure and wonder, “Could I have done something more?”

Courtesy of Peter Kaminski/Creative Commons License

It’s easy to beat yourself up, but you have to remember that we all have free will.  While you cannot control all of their decision you can have an influence.  To cut down on the turnover and encourage teens to stay connected to the church years after they are gone you need to make sure you are:

PLUGGING TEENAGERS INTO THE LIFE OF THE PARISH

Youth ministry needs to go beyond the youth room.  If all you do is feed them you’ll only create consumers.  Teach your teens how to be contributors by getting them involved in ministries on the weekend.

When you get them involved you give teach them that they don’t have to wait to make an impact.  You will provide for them experience, wisdom and confidence that can be a blessing to their future church home.

CONNECTING THEM WITH GOD LOVING ADULTS

Relationships are key to deeper discipleship.  If a teenager can connect with someone older than them you provide for them:

• A mentor with experiential wisdom.

• A role model on how to live out the faith.

• Experience of life in the real world.

By connecting them with other adults you expand your own influence.  You can use these other adults to help you impact, and invest in the lives of future leaders.

GIVING THEM THE WHY ON TOP OF THE WHAT

Too often we tell teens what they need to know and why it’s important in day to day life.  If you can answer the why you will keep teens engaged and thirsty for deeper truth.

To speak into their lives get to know the teens in your community.  Find out what competes for their money, time and energy.  Help them see how Jesus addresses these situations by sharing the Gospel.  Help them connect the dots.

BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS WITH PARENTS

Leverage the impact parents have on their teens by investing in them.  Give them a vision, encourage them to push their teen and praise them for the job they are already doing.  Remind parents that the journey doesn’t end at Confirmation or graduation.

To help them get to know them personally.  Share with them what you know and have learned about their teen.  Make sure they see you as an ally and resource.

CHALLENGING TEENS TO THINK FORWARD

It’s easy to get caught up in the now.  If you can help your teens think about the future of their faith you can help them create a plan for the next season of life.

Ask them the question, “Who do you want to be?”  Talk about values and setting goals.  Discuss the dreams they have and how they are connected to God.

In the end the teenagers in your ministry have free will.  They will choose whether to follow Christ on their own.  You can have a profound impact by providing opportunities, environments and relationships that advocate a relationship with Christ.