It is so much cooler outside today than yesterday, it feels like a 20 degree difference. Yesterday I was so glad to be inside, today I wouldn’t mind being outside. I tried to spend an hour or two with God this morning, just sitting in the chapel, reading scripture, but found it difficult and I know exactly why, it’s because I am tired, and not for a good reason. I stayed up to watch the Celtics and the Lakers play in the finals… I’m not even a huge NBA fan, but it’s been interesting to watch. But anyway, if I were to spend time with God outside I would probably be too distracted… I need to find a good quiet place.
I don’t know why it’s been difficult for me to spend time alone with God, focused time with God. Back in the fall I was pretty good with spending at least one full day with Him a month, just me and Him in solitude whether it was through formal prayer, quiet time, devotional, reading scripture, whatever… I was spending time with Him and things felt good. But I’ve struggled with that lately, feeling very overwhelmed and that’s even more reason to spend time with God.
And it isn’t as if I’ve been out of practice, our staff takes a half hour to an hour each week to just spend with God and even during those days I find it difficult. I feel God’s presence in my life, I just feel as if I should give him a little bit more of my time and focus. This blog has helped, it’s been a way for me to write and express thoughts and feelings about the things I love, and most of the time I try to focus on to writing to God. So God, I’m sorry I’ve been a little distant lately, I know that you love me. Thanks for the wonderful blessings in my life from Kate, to family, to friends, work, a new house and fun, exciting life, I love you too.