Are You Afraid To Let Down People?

We’ve all experienced a broken promise.  They hurt.  An expectation is made and when it’s not met you feel let down.

Courtesy of marvin L/Creative Commons License

In youth ministry there is a pressure to include everyone.  We feel like everyone needs to get involved.  The problem is it’s not possible.  People will be let down and disappointed because:

WE’RE HUMAN

While that might not be a good enough reason for the people you disappoint it’s a reality.  Instead of just giving up respond.

That means not repeating certain behaviors that lead to let down.  And it means avoiding situations that will trip you up.  To do that you need to:

EMBRACE YOUR LIMITS

You cannot do everything.  That’s why you need a team around you.  That’s why you feel exhausted at the end of a long day.  You are limited in what you do.

Instead of pushing the limits recognize them.  Build margin around them and ask people to hold you accountable. When you know your limits you won’t get yourself into situations you can’t get out of.

UNDERSTAND THE POWER OF ‘NO’

Sometimes you have to say “No” to good things to make room for greater opportunities.  ‘No’ sounds negative because it sounds like:

• I CAN’T

• I WON’T

• I DON’T WANT TO

And while there might be truth to some of those statements that word will provide you with bigger opportunities.  Adding the word, ‘NO’ to your repertoire will help you avoid that stigma of the youth worker who always over promises and under delivers.

BE THE FIRST TO OWN UP

Never let people hear bad news second hand.  Not only will it be a let down, but it will break trust.  If something happens in your ministry go to that person or group of people first no matter how challenging.

By being the first to own up you will avoid any rumors or miscommunication.  People will also appreciate your humility.  It also will repair the loss of trust quicker than if they hear it second hand.

PRACTICE CLARITY

If you are not clear people will assume.  When people assume it’s perfect for misaligned expectations. Make sure what you said is heard and understood.

To communicate clearly ask people for feedback.  Check-in from time to time and don’t be afraid of follow up.  Might sound like a lot but it’s worth it.

Again you can’t make everyone happy.  People will be still be let down by your actions.  Your job is to lean into it, embrace it and move forward.