boundaries
Why NO Is So Hard
I have forgotten how to say, “NO” recently. The other morning as I was getting ready for work I grew overwhelmed as I thought about everything that...
“Tone is the hardest part of saying no.” – Jonathan Price, Put That In Writing
Courtesy of sboneham/Creative Commons License
The word, “NO” holds a lot of power. It’s one that determines whether or not something happens. While tone is an important part of saying, “No”. It can be a stressful and difficult to say. But, you know you need to say it. And the reason you need to say, “NO.” is because:
YOUR PLATE HAS HIT IT’S LIMIT
When you commit to too much your effectiveness diminishes. Make sure what you are doing is what you need to do. To get things off your plate:
- Admit you are overwhelmed.
- Identify what can be passed off.
- Take advantage of what’s negotiable.
- Put God in the mix.
For more on this check out How to Get Things Off Of Your Plate.
SOMETHING DOESN’T ALIGN WITH THE VISION
The vision you have for your ministry is essential. It explains why you do what you do. There will be big opportunities that won’t necessarily align with your vision. Do not take them. Before taking something on always ask:
“How does this help the vision?”
If you can’t answer that then hold off on doing it. It might limit your ministry’s potential.
YOU ARE FEEDING THE CONSUMER MINDSET
There will be opportunities and events that everyone loves. These could be traditional events that could have been around for years. The problem is they do not feed anyone spiritually. The idea of getting rid of certain events might seem blasphemous. But, if they keep you from the vision and most importantly God, then you need to say, “No.”
IT’S A ONE WAY RELATIONSHIP
You might find teenagers, parents or even ministers who just take and never give. In these cases you need to know how to say, “No more.” If someone needs your attention make sure you set boundaries. Let them know when and how they can contact you. Find someone to hold you accountable, so that they can help you get out if needed. For more on people pleasing read here.
Learn to say, “No.” and you’ll be protecting yourself and your ministry. Don’t be afraid of saying, “Yes.”, but make sure you use the word, “No.” to balance the demands. For more on how to say, “No.” check out this post from YM360 (click here)
What area is it hardest for you to say, “No?” Is there one that I missed?